Rupert Spira: What Am I in the Absence of Thought and Perception?

Um my my question if my thoughts and feelings and senses and perceptions are offline what am I experiencing? >> That's a very good question. So you >> that's it. >> Yeah. Well, I'm just going to throw the question back to you. It's a beautiful question that that is a very good example of the questions I I gave you yesterday. What is gave you earlier? What is it that is aware of your experience? It's a it's a very good alternative formulation. If when I am not thinking, feeling, sensing or perceiving, what am I? That's the question. If I were to answer you with a word, that would just give you another thought. But you have to answer that question in your experience. And you there are often moments in your experience the the gap between two thoughts, the the experience of deep sleep, the fulfillment of a desire, a moment of astonishment, a moment there. There are many times in your life where there is this interruption, this pause when your mind is not focused, when your mind just defocuses from the content of your experience. What what are you experiencing then? That that it's a great question, but answer that from your own experience. What what remains of yourself when your thoughts and perceptions are, as you say, no longer online? nothing. >> You have the experience of being nothing. >> Well, I can I can get to a place when I'm meditating where all of a sudden I'll realize, hey, I wasn't thinking of anything there for a few minutes. But of course, now I'm thinking of that I wasn't thinking. >> So, what was present in your experience when you're when you're not thinking? Well, I guess that's my problem because everything I know is an experience. And if you take away all my experiences, I don't know what's left. I know. Everything I know is an experience. You take away the experience, all that remains is I know. All that remains is knowing or consciousness. You said it beautifully. Everything you know, it's an experience. I know my experience. I know my thoughts, feelings, sensations and perceptions. I awareness know my thoughts, feelings, sensations and perceptions. You take away your thoughts, feelings, sensations and perceptions. I awareness remains knowing nothing. That's what remains. What remains when all King Leia's thoughts feelings activities and relationships disappear? John Smith. So it's not an experience. >> No, it's that which knows all experience. It's that which enables all experience to be but is not itself an experience. What remains when the movie comes to an end? The screen. The screen is not an object in the movie. What remains when content of experience comes to an end. Just the presence of awareness. The presence of awareness is not itself an experience. >> I will recognize that. >> Is it is it recognizable? It >> it's a it's a it's a self-recognition. Yes. It's a it just um but it's not recognizable as an object of experience. You cannot find it in your experience. You can only you can only be that knowingly. You can't experience that as an object in the same way that you know your thoughts and feelings. For instance, you you can only you can only be that knowingly. You can't know it as an object. >> That's that's the hard part to comprehend. >> Well, it's it's hard for the mind. It's hard for the object knowing mind because the object knowing mind by force of habit always wants to know an object. So, it wants to turn awareness. King Leer wants to turn John Smith into somebody in his government that he can relate to. But John Smith will never be a friend of King Leah, someone he can someone King Leah can know. So the object- knowing mind wants to turn its essence, its nature into an object that it can know it. It's not possible. And that's frustrating for the mind until it understands this. And when it understands this, that frustration goes because the mind ceases to seek for awareness as an object of its own experience. The mind begins to relax back into awareness rather than reaching forwards for it. So, I'll know it when I get there. >> But not >> if you you could only get somewhere that was an object of your experience. You You're never going to get there. You are that It's very subtle. >> It It's very subtle. >> Thank you. But your your question is a is a beautiful question and a very well formulated question. What am I when my thoughts, feelings, sensations, and perceptions come to an end? That that's a beautiful question that that goes straight to the heart of the matter. So just just live with that question. Really live with that qu to take that take this whole week. If you didn't listen to anything else the whole week, I mean this seriously. If you just took that one question, what am I in the absence of thought and percept? When I say thought and perception, it just stops me having to say thoughts, feeling. By thought and perception, I mean the full range of your objective experience. What am I in the absence of thought and perception? Do contemplate that question. It's a beautiful question.