On episode 19 of his podcast, David Ghiyam answers listener questions about why relationships seem to start one way and shift dramatically over months or years, framing the dynamic through the Kabbalistic lens of pre-incarnation soul contracts.
Transcript
[Music] welcome everyone to episode 19 of our podcast and I wanted to start talking about this week's energy by answering actually a few questions that we have had about relationships and soulle contracts and why certain people come into our lives and why we go through the experiences we go through so the question that I'm often asked is how is it that when we meet someone they are a certain way in the beginning so maybe the first uh few dates are very positive the first few months are very positive maybe six months and sometimes even a few years and then something changes something turns the person isn't the same person we thought they were so I'm sure everyone listening can kind of go back in time and think of relationships that didn't just always follow the pattern and trajectory that we were used to or that we expected we had one type of expectation of love we anticipated one type of care and maybe we were fed that energy we were given that energy and then something switched so the question is what's happening on a spiritual level because if we don't understand and look at things from the perspective of the Creator then we will always look at things from the perspective of our own tikun of our own Soul's correction and so the answers we will get will only be to satisfy and feed the spiritual parasites inside of us so for example if a person came to this world with a fear of Abandonment then we know that part of the correction of the fear of Abandonment is to experience some form of loss so that experience will happen on a miniature level on a micro level or on a macro level on a much bigger level of loss but you will have to feel it you will have to feel loss in order to go through the darkness go through the pain make a decision that the light of the Creator is still there have complete certainty or at least attempt to have certainty that this is for the good and this is now you activating your God Gene the literal reason why you came to this world the only reason you came to this world you will fulfill your Soul's correction when this God Gene is activated Your Vessel now expands the light of the Creator comes in and we shift to a new Destiny where there are Miracles and there are wonders and there are all the fulfilling things even things that we cannot anticipate that we've ever wanted begin to come into our life so so if you have this correction of fear of Abandonment you will have to experience this fear have to at some point experience some form of loss if we do not look at it in the way that we're about to explain if we do not approach relationships or the loss of relationships or the disappointment in relationships or the rejection in relationships or the deception that we think we went through in relationships if we do not perceive it in the way that I'm about to share according to the sages we are merely reacting to the pain and feeding that soulle correction as opposed to transforming it we are empowering it we will be empowering our fear we will actually be thickening the curtain between our soul and our body and then we will be confused we will see everything in a distorted way we will keep choosing the wrong people or quote unquote wrong people in our lives we will be attracted to something toxic and we will feel repulsed by something healthy have you ever thought or wondered why that is you know the example I probably shared before of someone who's dating and she's she's very clear about how she wants to be in a long-term relationship however as she dates very good suitors and individuals what many might consider healthy or established um ones that care about her and I asked the question what was wrong with that one and what was wrong with that one and often the answer would come it's too perfect it's too good it's boring why is it boring because it's healthy in her eyes which means that there's something about the Soul's signal is not getting through because when the soul gets through the body when that thick curtain is no longer there and the Soul can communicate to the body the body's desire will be aligned with the Soul's desire so you will be Desiring something that is healthy for you as opposed to being attracted to something that is unhealthy for you it's very much like Health itself if my body has toxicity in it if I'm used to eating unhealthy then when my body sees or when I see food that is not good for me I will crave it if I'm used to having sugar when I see sugar I will crave it if my body is used to caffeine when I see caffeine I will crave it if my if I am a smoker and I'm addicted to smoking when I see a cigarette or even if I have an imagination of a cigarette or anything at all I will crave it now the body is craving something the soul knows and you even know maybe this isn't the best thing for me but why do I crave it so much we would love for our body to also be aligned with our soul we would love for our we would love to sit at a restaurant and ultimately this is what happens when we do the spiritual work your body is not ordering from the menu your soul is so your body may say I want meat but the soul will say actually we should choose fish why because the soul also sees and we've discussed this in deeper classes I believe cabala 2 and three we go into it that every animal and every plant and every mineral that comes to this world and especially the ones that appear at a dinner table has a soul in it and a spark of light that are unique to what we need in our spiritual journey so that fish or that meat or that salad isn't there just by chance and it's not just food it's actually light so the Creator arranges Sparks of light in different foods that we Elevate when we chew this food with the right intention and the right Consciousness and we're connecting to the essence the energy that's in food as the spiritual energy as opposed to the physical now if you aren't thinking this when you're eating you're not making a strong of a connection and often times you could eat the wrong foods and connect to souls that have actually tra been trapped in different animals that will cause a person's Consciousness to actually be changed so this is true and we know this actually thousands of years ago tribes would eat raw raw organs or raw Hearts before they would go into battle and War because it gave them a certain animalistic desire and power because this is the energy that is being transferred cabala also explains deeper and I don't think this is the time for it in this podcast because we want to focus on relationships but it is fascinating cabalo does also explain that eating from the Animal Kingdom creates a certain energy inside of us it's not good or bad but it's a certain energy plant kingdom creates a different energy and mineral creates a different one and so every soul is attracted to a different style of eating some people are vegan and they're emphatic about it some people only eat protein some people are vegetarian and whatever you are called to do often is the Soul's request of what it needs in order to elevate certain Sparks of Light which is really fascinating this is why we cannot judge someone who is vegan or not vegan this is why we cannot judge someone who has a certain diet that we might disagree with the reason why they desire it or crave it is because there is a connection that their soul needs to the light that is in that type of food and of course we go through Seasons sometimes We crave to be a certain way with a certain diet and then it transforms as well so going back to relationships the reason why things change and they inevitably will is because the person you are dating the person you're in a relationship with at some point they also have to go through their soul correction so maybe they were able to show up for you and give to you in a way that you really felt understood that you felt seen and heard but at some point along their journey in order for them to go through their sole correction their stability was taken away maybe they're going through a diffic difficult financial situation maybe they're going through a health condition maybe all of a sudden the Creator chose at that moment in time to awaken a fear in them an anxiety in them that maybe they did not have to deal with in the first six months and now they are going through their spiritual process but what happens when people are going through their Darkness through their Dark Night of the Soul through their next level we begin to take it personally and we don't fully understand these changes that are happening we think there's we are interacting with someone maybe who is selfish or who not have empathy for us or who just changed all of a sudden we begin to label people we begin to call them avoidant we begin we begin to call them narcissistic we begin to call them clingy or unhealed and the danger of that is we are not approaching this from why the Creator is putting us all through this process there's also a process you're going through because two people will never meet unless their tun or Soul Corrections are completely aligned energetically so the Creator arranged that this person this man or woman would go through their soul correction because of fears that are awakened in them at the same time that you need to go through yours you will never go through something no one can hurt you touch you or harm you unless there was permission given from the upper worlds for you to go through your process it's a very powerful and important concept nobody could hurt you unless there was a destiny to go through a certain process when we can see things Beyond hey you did this to me hey you are this and that the Creator then gives us Divine wisdom how to navigate this scenario and never repeat it again something we should never say is that relationship was terrible that person was terrible that person was a waste of my time that person took two years of my life that person I wish I had never met them every time we have this narrative or this vibration replace the word that person with the Creator the Creator wasted my time the Creator was toxic I wish I never met the Creator I hope the Creator suffers and is never happy I hope the Creator suffers the way I suffer effort I'm going to block the Creator I'm going to now go on a mission to tell everyone how bad the Creator is this is actually an example we do in cabala 1 we ask people to write down who is the person that has hurt you who is the person that has betrayed you or deceived you and then you have to change and what did they do to you and how did you feel and you have to change the name of the person with the Creator in the last 20 years that I've taught cabala W and I've done this example the laughter in the room because it's absolutely absurd you you're supercharged about this person who you literally think wasted your time stole your innocence made you jaded awakened all this trauma inside or created all this trauma but in reality it was the creator of the whole time and now we are angry with the Creator people don't even really exist nobody exists everything is an illusion all there is is you in the light of the Creator so when in in in in the great writings of the sages the verse is in there is nothing besides you in the light of the Creator and when you believe that and know that the darkness disappears the lessons become learned the Creator begins to speak to you your soul begins to shine overpowering your body and now your desires of the body are aligned with the desires of your soul and this is called entering the realm of Miracles it says that King David would wake up in the morning and his body would just move towards Miracles he didn't even have to think or choose often people say I don't know what decision to make when you don't know what decision to make my teachers have taught me it is because you still have not connected Body and Soul because the soul will immediately see the future because the future exists in the moment anyways there's no time and the body will know so when the body doesn't know it's because the body's not connected so instead of trying to figure out what do I do you must find ways to close the space between the body and the soul and the space is created by our negativity not the negativity of somebody else who doesn't even really exist your girlfriend does not exist your spouse does not exist your children do not exist the person who is taking credit for the work you're doing in your company does not exist the employees who are not giving you what you want the type of work you want who are not aligned energetically with you they do not exist your parents don't exist that one family member that you think has mental illness that is causing all these problems and this drama she does not exist he does not exist now do they exist in the physical world they do and if you want to live in the physical world what we call the 1% reality the tree of knowledge good and evil the realm of chaos and illusion that's a choice in that world I agree every man for himself there is no control you could be the smartest the wisest and the rich and you will suffer in the realm of the Tree of Life what we call the 99% the realm of the light of the Creator there's a different set of rules and if you want to exist in that realm access to this realm is they will ask you at the door what do you believe do you believe a do you believe there's nothing besides you in the light of the Creator if the answer is yes you're granted access if you say yeah I believe there's nothing but the light of the Creator and this guy who hurt me and this relationship that was a waste of time they don't let you in they send you back to the Physical Realm of chaos the whole point of the chaos of this physical world is that it will be so exhausting and painful that we will all start to ask questions who is the creator there must be something more than this every wealthy person I know at some point in their life has said or they will say what is the point of all this I got this I got that I got the home I got the car I got the other home I have money I fly wherever I want I do whatever I want I eat whatever I want I sleep with whoever I want and I feel unhappy there must be more than this often the negative side does not want them obviously to know that there's a realm called the realm of Miracles the realm of the light of the Creator so the negative side comes up with a backup plan and says let's be charitable let's start a charity let's do something very Noble and help people but please whatever you do do not connect your soul to the light of the Creator this is an interesting one what's so bad about being charitable by the way the negative side could also say go teach cabala go start teaching spirituality go be a teacher why because teaching cabala does not connect me to the light of the Creator in fact if anything truth be told it will create more difficulties for me to connect with the light of the Creator all it could possibly do for any teacher in this world is create an ego create the need for validation create a host of other problems which actually thicken the layers between the body and the soul the only thing that connects us to the light of the Creator is when we go through our personal transformation and we know that there's nothing besides us and the light of the Creator in every painful situation this is the only thing that connects us if you wrote a 100 books on spirituality and you changed a 100 million lives they do not care about this in the upper World well is that important it is because that puts you on a vibration that connects you to an energy that gives you the strength the Merit and the guidance to do your correction but it is not the correction itself we did not come to this world to write books nobody cares the Creator could write all the books the Creator could Enlighten everybody the creator doesn't need us to Enlighten anyone we only came with the free will to choose to become Godly ourself the only reason being a teacher being charitable could be a soul correction is if in that moment of a selfish Endeavor in life you choose to have an altruistic one that moment of transformation is is a is a revelation of life but after that the only thing that's going to reveal light is in your pursuit of helping others you will be tested and you must transform yourself in those tests it's not the help itself that is revealing the energy the new energy that our soul came to receive in summary this is the phrase this is the Mantra there is nothing besides me in the light of the creator I release blame from everyone in my life and I will no longer label people because it serves my negativity I will no longer I will no longer label people as a waste of time as negative as someone who betrayed me or deceived me these are all relationships that the Creator gave me for me to become a perfected self I will honor them because I want to honor the Creator I will appreciate them I will love them for the mission they did even though it was painful and as a result I will never have to not only repeat those relationships but it says that all Darkness becomes light all the sins become merits and everything that was once negative actually goes to the positive side and becomes like